the reverse double projection field
the mechanics of haunting yourself through energetic self-bamboozlement
self-haunting might be the actual subject matter of this newsletter - because what is shame and perfectionism if not just haunting your past (perceived) mistakes?
circling the wagons and digging deeper is my whole thing - THEREFORE, I bring you my newest concept - the reverse double projection field (you can also reflexively call it the double reverse projection field if you’d like)
Mechanically, it is this - a projection outward from yourself, but you perceive the projection to be originating from an external source - only to realize that you’ve concocted the entire thing and when you reverse the projection, you realize YOU ARE THE ONE PROJECTING ONTO THE OTHER PERSON.
If I were a restaurant, this would be the chef’s special. NOW SERVING: THE REVERSE DOUBLE PROJECTION FIELD -
I am so good at denying my feelings that I project them out, assign the projection to the other person, feel intensely about that projection being projected onto me only to realize it is my own projection !!!
this is a Michelin rated projection my friends, so good you have to incept yourself to fully enjoy it the full effects.
If you didn’t feel safe having a full range of emotions or experiences - CHRISTIAN REPRESSION STRIKES AGAIN (FOR ME!) - projections becomes the safe space where you can see the range of human experience BUT THEY ARE SAFELY OUTSIDE OF YOURSELF AND HAPPENING “TO” YOU AND NOT FROM YOU OR FOR YOU (to clarify, this is how it feels, not the correct mechanic)
I finally started to unravel this concept for myself last year - when I said something to the effect of, “so and so doesn’t like me,” and I had this feeling like, no bitch, you don’t like them and the idea of not liking them is so against your idea of yourself that you’ve sent this out and have decided it’s their decision to not like you when it is clearly I DO NOT LIKE THEM.
ONCE AGAIN THE CALL IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE !!! it is honestly kind of unbelievable how often I have Jedi-mindtricked1 myself into believing my own projection was someone else’s.
Until I opened up to the experience that I do have a hand in my own reality creation and my thoughts do markedly shape my perceptions of reality, I felt like a victim2 to my own “reality” (living in the reverse projection field more often than not)
The pressure is always coming from inside for me (defined root) but I project it outside and take it in as external pressure. The projection loop feels so real and solid until I remember that I can detach from the story and I create my own meaning.
I’d like to point out that I am so innately good at separating myself from my feelings that my default is to speak about myself in the 2nd person. As I’ve begun to really focus back on centering myself in my life and my energy - I have been able to center myself in my language more to describe myself (if you are prone to separating yourself from yourself you might like the exploration I did here)
ANYWAYS - THIS IS THE POINT OF THIS NEWSLETTER -
finding these points so that we can re-integrate into our whole selves. We’re in pisces season which is the feeling season and the end of the astrological year. The new moon in Pisces was 2.27.25 and the portal here has been strong for me.
The people around us are our biggest mirrors and colleagues in life school for an (unknown) stretch of time - which is inherently exciting and unsettling. When I choose to see life this way I can loosen my grip but it also brings my grief to the surface. Dropping the projection means feeling (gulp)
We have no way of knowing how long our course schedules will overlap with any particular person, so as much as possible, if we can relax into the moment, we can really take in the lesson and take the ride (I started exploring this theme in last week’s installment you can read here)
My life school curriculum at the moment appears to be about dropping the illusion of control and safety through my ability to project certain futures and allow myself to be present to the improv and dance of life
Me? I am a defined crown AND defined ajna projector (sidenote - mechanically you cannot have a defined crown without a defined ajna) and my top 4 gates are all logic gates, so there is a weighty dose of conjecture and pattern recognition in operating system at any moment.
If you’ve ever thought that I was aggressively fighting you because of my line of questioning, I probably was flirting as a fire sign I was actually just mid-reorganizing my logic flowcharts in my mind folders that I’m building and rebuilding in real time.
Any talent is a double-edged sword, so what makes me a gifted energy reader when invited can really run away from me when uninvited and I can be POWERFULLY wrong when it comes to me and my personal life.
When John Martin read my chart for me the thing that I remember most is being told that I only hear what I want to hear. AHHAAHHAH, 1,000 SKULL EMOJIS.
I came face to face with my projection field this week when it became glaringly obvious that I had not actually listened to a friend tell me about a piece of their personal lore. I had in fact picked up the wrong details and spun a narrative that was divergent from their truth. I was really knocked back by my miscalculation -
I’m constantly moving at 90mph in my lil brain space and when it’s in the wrong direction? well we can get in the weeds quickly (wasn’t the first time, won’t be the last)
but that’s the fun part of all of this- when I allow myself to observe and examine - I don’t have to beat myself up for the incorrect conjecture, I can instead understand how I’ve moved into a projection and redirect from there.
I was able to hear the correction and I had that glass breaking moment where I was like oh dear - I’ve been filling in a lot of gaps with my own projections instead of listening and being open to what’s actually happening in front of me.
getting caught up in the projection instead of the reality is how I keep myself safe from really being vulnerable - its a preemptive rejection of true intimacy with another person.
last week I wrote: Do you want to be happy or control perception? you cannot do both.
Catching myself deep in this reverse projection - I did have a moment of celebration of self - as I’ve done the work to now have the inner architecture to pivot and humbly admit my wrongs (to myself and others)
It can be easier for me to live in a narrative than open my ears and take in the reality around me (dissociation queens rise up!)
This moment pairs so beautifully with this new moon portal and invites me to pause - do I want to keep my stories and live in the safety of a projection or do I want to take a deeper look into the mechanics of the reverse projection field - because it is speaking directly to this question (be in the moment or live in the fantasy of control)
THE REVERSE DOUBLE PROJECTION FIELD IS AN ADVANCED SAFETY TECHNOLOGY- it is a self-protective mechanism for control.
Facing uncertainty? Feeling uncomfortable emotions? PROJECT THEM OUTWARD AND CREATE A FALSE SEPARATION MAKING IT SEEM LIKE YOU ARE AT THE MERCY OF THE OTHER PERSON! GENIUS LEVEL STUFF REALLY.
The reverse double projection field is kind of like shooting a gun into the air - it feels like you are doing something without consequence but the ramifications have now become an unknown quantity and can become quite messy. I want to take this opportunity to mention I have shot a gun exactly one time at summer camp (quintessential Jesus camp experience I assume, we’ve got guns and bibles) and I would be remiss to not mention that we did have real bullets - lets goooo, rural Pennsylvania!!
Double Reverse Projection - giving the illusion of control where there is not control.
The projection feels real, like something solid you can build off of and then you do get the bonus of (a false) sense of control. However, when something challenges the projection - you have the option to allow the perception to be shattered and step into the uncertainty of reality or you have the option to practice confirmation bias and allow yourself to keep functioning as is (unconscious process obviously) and it must be said that allowing your perceptions to be shattered is not for the faint of heart.
IF YOU ARE WATCHING THIS SEASON OF SOUTHERN HOSPITALITY WE ARE WATCHING THIS IN REAL TIME WITH EMMY + WILL. Emmy is so in love and deeply attached to the fantasy projection that she loses her mind rather than face what is happening in front of her.
We find ourselves in the double reverse projection field so that we don’t have to be constantly confronted by uncomfortable truths. It is ok to be scared to face the feeling - there is no certainty. there is no control. (I’m sure I’ve said this before, but after my first human design reading with John, I was shook for a full week when this really became clear to me) living life present is the most brave thing we can do.
this is why we keep returning to the body (a key theme in my work for a reason)
When I am able to center myself in the moment and open my ears and listen and be present, then I am not in the story. Being present however means letting go of the ILLUSION OF CONTROL. When I move into the narrative and hold onto the conjecture as truth - I am closing myself off to the opportunity for real connection and surprise and delight.
Recently I reignited my love for tapping (eft) and when I had a moment by myself, I tapped on my uncertainty - reminding myself that projections are projections and I am safe being present in the moment.
I do not have to grip for control. I can listen. I can be here now.
we’re going into eclipse season this month - so more to come soon.
xx, JG
I am raising my prices for my 1:1 sessions - it’s been 5 years at my current rates and it’s time for them to be upped - so if you want to book at my current rate - book now
it should be evident by now that I have no idea if I am using this reference correct or not - I have seen Star Wars exactly one time when it was on appointment tv during my young childhood and my dad insisted we watch as a family
I don’t love using this word, but im feeling too lazy to write it a different way
This is so true and in my face at the moment, it made me laugh.
And...I've had the experience lately of watching my projections change in real time, as I change how I hold myself (and what parts I allow to be seen). This has been so beautiful to experience. I go first...everyone else just follows along the game I set up.